If North Korea Pissed Here They’d Be Happy


In my opinion, every man, woman and child should learn, love and know the beauty of the “Nature Piss”. It is a time spent with the delicate forces of our universe when you are at its’ complete and total mercy. Especially after a couple of Mountain Dews (no pun intended). Anyone who takes the time to relax and whizz into the (downward) wind knows what I’m talking about.

It’s freedom people.

Sweet, sweet freedom.

It’s something we need to teach to those freaks in North Korea. (One piss beside Mount Rushmore and the north Koreans would be sobbing over our Constitution. It would set them straight. I’m just saying…)

I made it a personal pledge long ago to take a “Nature Piss” in every country I visit.


Because that’s the kind of thing I like to do. Anyone can take a picture of the Grand Canyon- not everyone is willing to risk a fine for peeing over the rim. I relish the risk. And I’m probably mentally unstable.


So far the list includes:




Northern Ireland (obviously. I live here. “Hi, neighbors!”)


Canada (nobody noticed here cuz there’s so many hippies and whatnot)



Holland (right into the canal)

Germany (East and West– well, at the time they were seperated. It was fun trying to pee on the Berlin Wall on the eastern side. And by “fun” I mean I was this close to being arrested.)

Yugoslavia (or Croatia or whatever)

Italy (3 times)

Switzerland (I was very efficient about it)


Greece (that was f*cking scary. The traffic, that is.)

France (they deserve it. I hate the French.)

New Zealand (too many to count.)


Russia (both Moscow and St. Petersburg/Leningrad)

And now…..drum roll, please…….the Republic of Ireland! More specifically, the county of Kerry. Which is where we spent our latest holiday.
This is the first time I had my digital camera with me when such a moment presented itself and I thought I’d share it with you.

Because I care.

(BTW. I didn’t change the colors on the above pic. Something happened that made it look all purple-ly and Alice-in-Wonderland-ish. Dunno what happened but it looks kinda cool.)



  1. I’ve only bumper pissed in a cornfield in Ohio. Does that count for any points? Take into consideration the lack of a penis here.

  2. I’m not familiar with the term “bumper piss” but I’ll allow it.

    Full points.

  3. Wayne, What a great idea. I don’t think I’ve ever broken it down before. Let’s see, the following is a list of countries that I’ve pissed in outside the constraints of a loo, water closet, outhouse, latrine, head or bathroom….
    USA, Canada, Mexico, Guatamala, Panama, Peru, Japan, Austrailia, Philippines, So. Korea, Thailand, Germany(East and West), England, Ireland, France, Spain, Czechoslovakia, Philadelphia and Holland.

  4. Ooops! I forgot Mexico. But does Tijuana still count as Mexico or simply as a right of passage?

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